That all-consuming, anxiety-ridden, "I-can’t-live-without-you" feeling? Riso calls it what it is: a pathological dependency, not love. He shows you the neurological and psychological hooks that keep you trapped in a cycle of pleasure and pain.

In this book, Riso posits that love is not merely a feeling or a stroke of luck, but a skill—a competence that can be learned, developed, and improved. He argues that the high failure rate of modern relationships is not due to a lack of love, but a lack of knowledge on how to love.

A central theme in Riso’s work is that is the fundamental prerequisite for any healthy romantic relationship. According to Riso, poor self-esteem is the primary driver of emotional dependency, insecurity, and fear of rejection in couples. He advocates for a "realistic self-love" that avoids the traps of extreme self-criticism or perfectionism. The Three Pillars of Healthy Love

Riso draws a sharp line between long-term love and the physiological state of ( enamoramiento ). He describes infatuation as a temporary "socially accepted virus" that lasts roughly six months, often clouding judgment and decreasing intellectual capacity. True love, by contrast, is a conscious decision that respects individual freedom and identity. Key Principles for Relationship Health